Antidotes to Burnout (Part 1)
by Robert Hackman
Photograph by Meric Tuna on Unsplash
This burnout, I don’t want it
Lyric from the song ‘Burnout’
By Mugsea
Like regrets, no one wants burnout. Yet, without methods, plans, and support in place, we remain susceptible to it. Even then, we can succumb to it if we are not careful.
In our culture, business, never having enough time, and being overwhelmed have become status symbols. The spirit of never saying no and always getting it done regardless of the cost feels like an imperative we cannot ignore in our work and personal lives. The related always-on ethos depletes us, setting us up for exhaustion, poor health, and breakdown.
These all too common, true-to-life scenarios do not serve anyone, still, they happen just the same.
What leads to burnout? What changes must you make to prevent exhaustion? How do Everyday Legacy Mindsets provide an antidote to burnout and put you on the pathway to living and leading with fewer regrets?
Please note, (Part 1) of this article answers only the first of these questions.
What leads to burnout?
Burnout occurs when we deplete ourselves through our attempts to accomplish too much without giving ourselves time, methods, and resources to replenish.
We say yes to too much because we believe we must. At a core level, we may fear saying no will cause us to lose status, subject us to rejection, or cast us out of our circle of belonging.
These fears are common. We all have them to varying degrees. And they are highly threatening. We require the protection of the tribe to survive. Consequently, the threat of them drives all manner of unhealthy and unhelpful responses as we strive to keep them from happening.
When too much is asked of us, we can find ourselves in a double bind: we have to, but we can’t, and we can’t, but we have to. These demands can take the form of challenges that test our limits, a combination of competing demands that collectively become too much, or a combination of both.
Misalignment
Burnout stems from activities and responsibilities that do not align with what we do best or value most. When this occurs, we end up working at cross purposes within ourselves, causing us to strain significantly more than if we were working from the path of who we are and who we aspire to be in accordance with our most treasured principles.
Working in alignment with ourselves and others fulfills us. Working out of alignment drains us.
Absence of Purpose
When we have not determined the few things that are of utmost meaning to us, we open ourselves to being buffeted, pushed, or led by other people’s needs and desires rather than our own.
We have no way of asserting what we want and need because we do not know what they are.
External and Internal
Crucially, we must be aware that stress comes from external sources and internal ones. External pressures are more readily recognized because we experience them more directly.
Stresses coming from within us are more likely to reside outside our level of awareness. When this happens, they exert strain on us without our knowledge.
Most frequently, they stem from messages and mandates we received or developed when we were young. They continue to repeat themselves in adulthood until we learn to let them go and practice the courage to replace them with what we have decided holds meaning for us.
Story-Making
We are story-making machines. Just as we cannot not communicate or stop living and leaving our Legacies. We cannot keep from creating stories. It is akin to trying not to visualize something. If you tell yourself not to think of a piece of pizza, you will conjure a picture of one.
Without realizing it, we respond to the stories we have made up about ourselves, others, and situations – not reality. The question we need to keep returning to is whether the stories we tell ourselves help us or hurt us. Through self-reflection, feedback, and support from others, we can shift our narratives to more useful ones.
Environment
Our environment has a more significant effect on us than we realize. Each of us responds to them in our own way. The environments that we find unhealthy trigger us in unwanted and unhelpful ways, zapping our energy in the process.
Healthy, pleasing environments, on the other hand, nourish us. They give us energy.
Our environments induce behaviors, shape how we respond, and influence the ways we interact. Do they support what we aspire to or detract from it?
If We Know We Will Do
Regardless of how often we prove it is not true, we continually believe that if we know, we will do, which is not the case. We need help. Most crucially, we must be willing to change. Changing ourselves is a much more significant undertaking than we give credit to.
What changes are you willing to make? What changes will make the most difference for you? What changes can you make readily, and which will take some time? What support do you need to make these changes? What help do you need from your environment?
What do you need to give up or let go of to make room for what is most vital for you? Striving to do too much or do it all puts you on a treadmill destined for exhaustion or collapse.
You can see there is much more going on for us than we realize without considering it. That is what makes us so vulnerable to the unwanted stress that can lead to burnout and all its unintended consequences.
Stress and anxiety are part of the human condition, yet that does not mean we have to be at their mercy. Raising our awareness of the factors that lead to undesirable stress is the first step to reducing it.
Worthy Inquiries:
- Do you believe you are susceptible to burnout? If so, are you willing to develop approaches to protect yourself against it?
- Have you developed habits and practices that provide time, methods, and resources to replenish yourself? What happens when you apply them? What happens when you don’t?
- Do you believe if you know, you will do? How easy is it for you to genuinely change yourself? Do you need help or not?
- Do you notice the stories you make up about yourself, others, and situations? If so, do you question their validity or completeness? How do your narratives serve you? How do they hurt you?
- Do you notice how different environments impact how you feel, behave, and interact? Which ones nurture you, and which ones drain you? How can you make sure to spend more time in enriching ones?
If you want to discuss ways to develop and grow your leadership to benefit yourself, your team, your family, or your organization, please reach out to me. I welcome the connection.
Robert Hackman, Principal, 4C Consulting and Coaching, helps people live and lead with fewer regrets. He grows and develops leaders through executive coaching consulting, facilitation, and training of individuals, teams, and organizations. He is committed to Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion. He facilitates trusting environments that promote uncommonly candid conversations. Rob is also passionate about the power of developing Legacy Mindsets and has conducted over 50 Legacy interviews with people to date.
A serious man with a dry sense of humor who loves absurdity can often be found hiking rocky elevations or making music playlists. His mixes, including Pandemic Playlists and Music About Men, among others, can be found on Spotify.
Bravely bring your curiosity to a conversation with Rob, schedule via voice or text @ 484.800.2203 or rhackman@4cconsulting.net.